Life's a Blur

So, in the past two months I graduated from college, got a job offer, rejected that job offer, got into grad school, enrolled in that grad school, spent a month in Europe, and tried to make sense of all that was going on. It's hard to believe that I'm moving on to the next phase of my life. The good thing is that I have given myself a month and a half to process it.

During my entire time at UT, I hardly ever sat down to just enjoy it and take in the fact that I was in college. That these were going to be the best four years of my life. And now it's over. I don't have any regrets, but I finally understood what people meant when they said that they would be the best four years of my life.

So now I'm moving on to graduate school in the hopes that in three years a Master's degree will not have depreciated in value like the Bachelor's has. And also so that when I apply to jobs, my application will actually be reviewed. However, I'm still not sure that in two years I'll be ready for the working world. Working M-F 8-5 year round. No more Spring Break. No more month long Christmas break. And no more summer vacation to "work" a summer job. Yet, I'm not sure if it's the idea of the working world that scares me, or the lifestyle that comes along with the working world.

Just the thought of being an adult sends my head into a tail-spin. Rent or mortgages, health insurance, car insurance, car payments, savings, 401Ks, other bills, marriage, kids, being able to afford kids, life insurance, retirement.....and so on and so on. Whenever I think of all of these future responsibilities, it reminds me to live in the moment. I've always been someone who likes to plan my future far in advance. When I got to undergrad, I had planned everything out all the way to grad school. Of course those plans changed the first semester. Now the summer before I start grad school, I have already planned out what I'll be doing and what jobs I'll be applying to when I graduate. But I think now, having flown through undergrad without taking the time to look up and around, I will really appreciate and count my blessings far more often.

~T